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I can't believe it's been nearly a year since my last post family, but it makes sense because this year has been crazy/chaotic/beautiful in many ways (will discuss in an upcoming post) which has subsequently taken me away from my love of blogging. Despite the time since my last blog post, it seems perfectly fitting, however, that the first post of 2024 is about my truly life-changing experience in Ubud, Bali, Indonesia and I invite you to continue reading about all the things that occurred in the two-week time that I was there.
I'll begin by simply saying that Bali is one of those places I hope everyone can visit at least once in their lifetime.
Why?
Because Bali is truly magical.
It’s powerful.
It’s deeply spiritual.
It’s moving.
It’s transcendent.
It’s so beautiful.
It’s so(ul)-nourishing.
It's healing.
& it’s a place that can really catalyze a most profound transformation.
It really is the most incredible place I’ve ever visited and that’s saying a lot given my pretty extensive travels in 37 rotations around the sun.
What’s interesting is that most people on the island (including the locals) say that Bali “calls” you, which is a way I've often described Caye Caulker, Belize (the island where my family and I currently live). Many people go and many of them soon leave because it simply doesn't vibrate at their same frequency or perhaps it awakens things inside of them that they aren't yet ready to confront. Like Caye Caulker, it's a place where you can either confront your shadows and transcend them or you can very easily run from them and enjoy the simple joys of escapism. The choice is always yours.
Bali is also commonly referred to as “Mama Bali” and people say that those who she chooses, she nurtures in almost maternal ways; healing you, feeding your mind, body and spirit and comforting you as you delve into her powerful healing modalities and yall...I have to say that given my experience there, I couldn’t agree more.
But before I get into the details of my most recent trip to Mama Bali, I think it's imperative that I point out that what’s most interesting about my experience(s) in Bali (I first ventured there in September ’24 for my inaugural retreat on the island), is that in October '23 when I was first offered the chance to expand The L.E.A.P. Retreat via Trova Trip, I absolutely did NOT want to go to Bali!
In fact, Trova Trip gave me the chance to choose from over 50 different countries around the world and the two places where I absolutely REFUSED to take my retreat were Costa Rica and Bali because I felt like both places had become oversaturated with healing retreats and content creators and as an “influencer”, my rebellious Scorpio spirit simply couldn’t become one in a million retreats hosted in either place. As a seasoned retreat hostess, I’d like to think that my retreat is truly unique and I believe that it sells out every time I launch a new experience because it really captures the true essence of what it means to "take the l.e.a.p." (let everything align perfectly). It also succeeds at facilitating a most profound spiritual transformation while building lifelong connections between the Black women who commit to this experience. In knowing this, I just didn’t want to taint any of that magic by situating my retreat in either of the two places where the spiritual energy seemed to be riddled with content creators who were more concerned about getting “that shot”, you know?
In remaining steadfast about not going to either Bali or Costa Rica, my partners at Trova Trip told me, however, that the retreat destinations were selected based on the results of a poll that my followers must complete and yall...Bali won by a landslide. I’m not going to lie, I was a little disappointed because again, I really didn’t want to go there! I’d imagined taking my girls to Thailand, Peru, Morocco or Zanzibar as those were all places on my bucket list but also places with deeply powerful energies to facilitate spiritual growth and development.
But Bali it was…
I began doing my research in preparation for the September ’24 retreat and I was very, VERY quickly made aware of the island's diverse spiritual modalities, beliefs, healers, spiritual ceremonies, practices and rituals that are all done to deepen our inherent connection to Spirit and soon, I came to the realization that Bali may in fact be a perfect location for my retreat. I launched my inaugural retreat, unsure of the outcome but trusting the opportunity for expansion and within 24 hours, it sold out.
It was clear then that there was something on Bali that was calling me (and the 24 ladies of my retreat). Then, if you can even believe this, within not even a month of selling out the retreat, one of my former participants of the Belize May ’23 retreat, Latasha, took the leap herself and launched her own retreat on Bali, scheduled for November ’24 and guess what? She asked me to come as a Sponsored Guest!
It's giving full circle moment!
(Belize | May '23 & Bali | November '24)
This would mean that a mere 6 weeks after my inaugural retreat in September, I would be returning to Bali for Latasha’s experience and it then...right then...it became even clearer that Bali was calling me for a very specific and entirely divine purpose.
The time came for my inaugural retreat in Bali and in all honesty, it was spectacular. Though it came with its challenges because I was hosting such a large group in a place I’d never been and subsequently didn’t have the same control over the group/itinerary like I usually do for my Belize retreats, I also learned a powerful lesson which is that people come to Bali of all types of reasons: mostly for the content and many for spiritual healing.
The (tough) lesson I learned is that The L.E.A.P. Retreat, which has been now been called to be hosted on Bali as well as on Caye Caulker, must be protected; intentionally, purposefully and unapologetically. Caye Caulker is less popular than Bali so those who choose to attend retreats here are all coming for the same reason which is to be lead and guided through a sacred and intimate spiritual wellness experience. Now that I've executed my first retreat on Bali, however, I've been taught the necessity of ensuring that those who choose to take the leap there with me, are coming in complete understanding of and in alignment with my intentions for the experience. But you know...even with the challenges of the first retreat, I never felt afterwards as if I didn't want to host another retreat on Bali. I never felt like "see, this is why I didn't wanna come here in the first place!" In fact, despite the challenges, I found my own deep connection to Bali and felt radically empowered to host not only another but many more retreats there because when the women come who are intentional about their healing, caring less about content and more about their commitment to transforming their lives, despite my initial hesitation, Bali is in fact an absolutely incredible place to HEAL!
Was the retreat a success? Yes!
But will I intentionally pour into and protect it differently for the next one? Definitely.
Still with me? Okay perfect!
Because this is when things begin to shift in really beautiful ways...
Although this might sound a little crazy, I feel like somehow it was all divinely orchestrated for me to have had a more challenging first experience on Bali (a necessary haze lol), which is perhaps why I was given another opportunity to return, not as a retreat hostess but this time as a Sponsored Guest who also got to experience the 11/1 portal, my solar return on 11/6 and the manifestation portal of 11/11 all in Ubud, Bali, which is considered the spiritual epicenter of the entire island.
...and y'all. Like I said before...these two weeks in Ubud were some of the most transformative of my entire life.
I got to venture quite literally all over the city; from Southern Ubud where I enjoyed a sponsored trip to the Bali Zoo and came face-to-face with my land spirit animal (the elephant), to central Ubud where I spent a lot of time stocking up on my favorite jumpsuits and incense while filling my belly with so(ul)-nourishing foods, getting 4 new tattoos (hehe, they were small I promise), hanging out by the lotus ponds (IYKYK), and doing my own exploration while familiarizing myself with the city center. I even ventured to West Ubud where I had the most powerful spiritual experience with all-women healers at Tri Desna Healing (I'll be writing a separate post about that because...whew). I tried food at some of the best restaurants in town, noting a few that will be added to the itinerary for my July ’25 Bali Experience, I connected deeply with the local community and made what feel like genuine connections and came to realize that Balinese people really are some of the friendliest, most genuine people I’ve ever met.
For the first week of my 2-week stay in Ubud, I returned to the guesthouse BatanTop Guesthouse Ubud, where I’d stayed in September a few days before my retreat began because not only is it very inexpensive for the oasis it provides, but also because the local Balinese family that owns and operates it made me feel like I too was part of their family. Their warmth and genuine kindness perfectly embodies the beauty of Balinese people so there was no question about whether or not I would return. In fact, on my solar return, just as I was heading out to take myself on a dinner date, they surprised me with a cake and sang me Happy Birthday and my heart just burst with gratitude!
Understand, however, that this place is only $25/night with few amenities, so it’s perfect for the budget traveler but not ideal if you're looking for a little more luxury (spa, restaurant, etc.). I kept going back and forth about whether or not I’d book another place for the second half of my stay (especially having turned 37) and literally booked then cancelled another hotel because I just didn’t feel like it would give me anything that my original guesthouse didn't already provide. Well, days into the first week of my stay, Spirit woke me up in the middle of the night (during what’s commonly known to spiritualists as “witching hours”, a time when supernatural energies are believed to be the most powerful) and I was led to go on Booking.com where instead of search for another guesthouse, I started searching for a villa. Now this is not usually "like me" because I don't mind fewer amenities for a more cost-efficient accommodations, plus since having children, I'd grown accustomed to feeling a little guilty about splurging on certain things; luxury hotels being one of them.
In this moment, however, Spirit was speaking through me as I kept saying out loud in my room alone, "Yea, you know what? I deserve this!” and I soon found the most perfect one-bedroom villa with only ONE availability left for the exact dates that I was looking for and guess what the total cost was? $333.00USD. Baby, the angels and the ancestors were surrounding me, cheering me on as I finally took the leap to go for something I knew I wanted and deserved but had been too hesitant at first to book because every other villa I'd seen was well into the thousands. The villa was absolutely STUNNING and upon entry, it felt like I was led to live in something that would later become a most beautiful manifestation.
Another highlight of this experience was being offered a sponsored trip to the Bali Zoo. It meant so much to me because since moving to Belize, truthfully, I hardly ever receive any sponsored trips/opportunities (despite lots of meetings, viral content re: Belize, my retreats, etc.) so it felt good to be seen as someone who's content was worthy of this opportunity. I particularly loved that it was a sponsored trip to see exotic animals because as a child, I wanted to be an animal behavior ecologist (like a Black Jane Goodall), so this experience nurtured my inner child in ways I just wasn't expecting! I also have a picture JUST LIKE the one below from when I was 8 years old and went to the Animal Kingdom. Talk about alignment.
As I work intentionally to heal deeply-rooted mother wounds that were cracked open mere months ago due to a very dramatic and painful falling out with my mother (who ironically was supposed to be on this trip with me), I’m so grateful to have had this experience that stitched my wounds back together and allowed me to simply be me; not just a daughter who's mourning the loss of her mother who's still alive (sometimes that pain hurts far worse than if she'd passed), or a friend who'd spent the early months of this year in tears wondering why friendships I’d thought would last a lifetime ended up only being lessons in boundary-setting, overextending and people-pleasing or a pet-mama who lost my sweet pitbull this summer, only a year after having also lost my cat, I was given the rare opportunity to simply be Bree. For so much of this year, it felt like I was barely holding together what felt like pieces of me that were falling apart because despite my pain and my grief, my children still needed me, my businesses still needed me, my marriage still needed me and I’m needed in all of my chosen relationships, which require an extra dose of attention given that I live abroad.
Mama Bali gave me this second chance to come back, to ground myself in its most powerful energy centered in Ubud and in quiet moments of reflection, I realize that I got everything that I needed and more. I got a chance through an extremely powerful water purification ceremony to release everything I’d been feeling & holding onto but hadn’t spoken about nor released, I got to finally sit with and confront things I’d buried deep into my subconscious mind (which in turn were eating me up on the inside), releasing them from my mind, body and spirit and offering the Universe a chance to transmute that energy into something positive. I got the chance to do what I love most which is connect with other like-minds, animals and spirits in the name of authenticity and transparency, I got to explore and spend necessary time in spiritual solitude, becoming my own best friend again and remembering what it feels like to have built sanctuary in my own company.
The last but perhaps most significant highlight of this experience was being entrusted to lead two spiritual wellness workshops at Latasha’s inaugural retreat, Heal and Hustle, as a Sponsored Guest. This opportunity meant more to me than she’ll ever know because since 2022 when I first launched my inaugural retreat in Belize, I’d always been told that I didn’t have what it took to ever consider myself a healer (though ironically being a direct descendant of mystics and healers). As such, for every retreat (and I've done 6 now), I’d only ever outsourced the wellness workshops to other healers because I’d internalized what I'd been told for so long and ended up believing it; that I didn't have what it took to hold space for women as a healer. What Latasha saw in me - having attended my retreat and then launching her own - was something that I’d believed deep down about myself but was too afraid to step into and that’s my own divine power and calling to heal. The workshops were absolutely beautiful and I am so looking forward to leading more workshops at more retreats including my own.
What Bali did to me and for me in these two weeks was more than any place has ever done for me in my entire life. In only a matter of months, a place I’d not originally wanted to go had turned me upside down, inside out and healed parts of me that nothing nor no one (not even me) could access. Like I’d been told it would, Mama Bali held me, it comforted me through the most powerful release and gave me ample time to sit with who I’d become on the other side of that experience. It fed me, it nurtured me as I reconnected with who am I outside motherhood, entrepreneurship and marriage and though I was never by water, the downloads from Spirit were endless, the synchronicities abundant and the message clear; there’s a home in Bali, a place where it’s okay to be a little broken, a lotta healed but all of me.
There’s a place in this world that holds space for me as a healer, despite however many times I’d been told by people I’d loved and trusted that I wasn’t worthy of this work.
And so it was sad to leave Bali because it feels like leaving the warmth of a mother’s bosom but I am so profoundly grateful for this experience because my boys are getting a better mother, my father is getting a better daughter, my retreats are getting a better host, but most importantly, after 37 rotations around the Sun, I can now look at myself in the mirror and see a more aligned, a more healed and more ascended version of myself.
Moral of this (long) story:
Keep your heart open to the ways in which Spirit leads you down the path it has intended for you because if you move out of your own way and surrender to the journey, you may be guided to the places, people and things that can fundamentally transform your entire life.
If you’ve made it this far, I deeply appreciate you reading this rather long post and if you’d like to join me in Bali for my second retreat, one that is intentionally curated for deep reflection, release, shadow work and spiritual renewal, this time based entirely in Ubud, I invite you to join me and snag one of the last remaining spots on this incredible experience.
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